Like a 'Son', not a 'Princess'..

Let me put the first things first. I am a true feminist <bold,italic,underline>. But may be I must be careful while saying that, I am a selective feminist, true to ideology.I am not at all concerned/disquieted about the so called relationship crisis that the modern and ultra modern girls (no offence meant, as I really don't care of the strict sense of word-use here) today face in their feebly defined domains of 'love and relationships'(Most of my encounters ended where it mattered till it changed their relationship status on Facebook)! Sorry if I am being too harsh,but those are the instances I came across. I really pity the guys there,trust me,I have to, as I grew up with a bunch of awesome brothers who turned out to be just fine men now! 
Well,I am truly concerned about the actual feminist issues,that are malignant in today's society based on a highly inviolable patriarchal ideologies, not that I am striving to change the conditions but I can say,my thoughts waver around those once too frequently! Woohh!! I am getting too technical and ideological on you I guess.. Well.. there is one simple issue I wanted to really talk about. This post is strictly urban centric.Not at all in intention to hurt any feminists out there. You ll know!


Here goes,

I accompanied my friend to a mall(Ugh!) the other day, and came across a really regular, everyday incident that made me ponder over a little longer than I usually take notice of.. A father with his two children, a boy and a girl,came across one of his colleagues, introduced his kids..
"Hello Sir, this is my son!" <With a pat on the back>
"and this is my little princess" <with both his arms on her shoulder, protectively>
I felt that something different happened there, you may not agree with me! But then, yeah! When their dads introduce the daughters as princesses and the people compliment on her fragile delicacy, the pride a father gets! Yeah.. that is what that made me think..
Here, when a father does that, it subtly implants in the kid's mind..
She either wants to be someone's queen someday, or
She is accepting the fact that she is never going to be treated like a princess ever again. Yeah, and what is with all the sharing on Facebook, saying 'I am my dad's little princess' ?? People are really driving me crazy(Don't even get me started on the cute baby pictures..and sweet comments on them,that is a whole other story!!)I know it is not in the literal sense that they share all those, but really.. Really, what is this craze for the fantasy of being a princess?? They don't have a lot of fun, they don't have to 'earn' anything, all the things are destined to come to them. Fabricated socialization with ornate surroundings where there is never a hint of 'pain'(except for a rare few).. All that is there, is just the glory and grandeur.. Sounds utterly boring!! I did not even say anything of prima donna yet! Uff!! Being treated a princess, fine, I can understand.. Again,on Facebook, what is with this Twilight obsession! Rush of being soooo like Bella?!! No no.. It doesn't end there, you want him to be like Edward! Vampire craze! Seriously! Are you freaking kidding me?!!! First of, that is love at sight(doesn't matter first or whatever) anyways, hands down,that is like the worst love story I ever set my eyes on!


Yeah,yeah.. Getting carried away! Let me come back to the point.. that is where the whole problem starts..in her childhood. She wants her husband or her boyfriend to be more like her father, but it can never match to her expectations on par with the unconditional parental love. She wants him to change a lot in the process where after a while,he feels like he lost himself, may be that is why there is a tremendous lift in the breakups and divorce rates these days. So I think,The more you 'expect' to be treated like a princess, the less you have the chance of earning a sense of 'satisfaction, fun, accomplishment' ,right?


So it would not have been a problem if there was no protective patronage.. if the dad would have introduced her as "This is my daughter" <with a pat on the shoulder>. Like a Son, Not a Princess. After all.. everything that happens in childhood comes around in every phase.. It will always be an inevitable part of who you are, what you do, what you expect and how you perceive things everyday... Most importantly, how you sustain them!
That must have sounded like a really long and boring lecture on a petty issue, but this piece of writing here, is a product of the many frustrated moments I spent listening to my really close friends' so called 'relationship crisis' and patch ups.


We all know Karl Marx,but no one speaks about his aristocratic spouse,truly,I have immense respect for her,her passions and desire to keep them alive all through made her go a long way! #Passion #Admiration! I must say! Well,there is one good friend of mine who had a different story to share, as is to be noted, her father never introduced her to be princess, he loved her like he did his son, making her capable enough to deal with knowing what she wants, seriously, the lady has some clarity in what she wants. 
Well,clarity in 
Life,she makes it a point that her dreams are worth living and will gain her,someday, her own identity..
Love, that is not taken for granted,not defining 'status', while letting each other not lose their identity. It is nice that she knows the value of belonging during hardships, and that a person who is by your side when in pain is going to be with you,come what may, because.. you know, only love and suffering can reveal the most important secrets of life,rather than confining a relationship to gifts, fun and really long,mostly meaningless phone conversations! 
Marriage, trust me, she can make it work,always!! She has that self-chiseled charm in her that makes me look up on her dad as her real 'hero'.. Now I realize,may be it is not too bad growing up never being referred to as 'princess'.. I met nice people! Knock-on-the-wood! Don't want to jinx it..
If you did not get any of that, you need to get only this: Don't make your friends regret their long phone conversations with you, especially when they hate mobiles like me! Its time for some reality and toughness,and that means, the exact opposite of 'cute', 'sweet' and 'Bella-ey'!


PS: This was a result of a really bedevilling and persistently annoying phone call from a friend who has a 'relationship crisis'. I am irritated, and that is really rare.. So I thought I ll take full advantage of this frustration (Thanks to Emile Durkheim!!) and change my template too.. something dark you know.. looks like my taste always goes with minimalistic grunge and my love for blue :D Now now,I don't want to quetch more here.. So..


#Ravali Prasad Signing off! Adios!

The delicate rhythm of a boatman’s song

His eyes had a glitter of glee and celebration, the bicycle sped past the village temple, the aarthi was going on and devotees were singing the bhajans, usually he would have stopped to have put the tilak on his forehead before he went home, but today all that was echoing in his ears was the rhythm of the boatman’s song. Screeching halt infront of a magnificent household, the 6 year old carefully placed the cycle in the shed,he ran towards the house. He was excited as this was his first time alone in the village on the cycle. He rushed inside, saw his aunt sitting in the verandah, panting and all puffed up started singing the song he heard by the river, it was about the river itself and how it flows, like life.. 


“I went to the river all by myself aunty! All by myself! I am all grown up! I was playing near the mango tree, by the school, the fisherman was singing this song while getting his net ready.”

“Oh, so it is a boatman’s song huh?”


“Yes aunty, he told me all about fishing, casting the net and the baits. Then his children came from the school. We played hide and seek, they bought me an ice-gola. I promised that I ll come to play with them every day.”


“So you played with those kids? Go take bath before you enter the house. They are not good kids. You are never going to play with them again.”


“But aunty! They were very nice to me. We had a lot of fun. I promised them. Why shouldn’t I play with them?”


“They are bad kids. They go to a bad school where they teach everything wrong. You should not touch them and you are not going to play with them. Now stop asking me more questions, go take bath now!”


His eyes fell, excitement drained, he left to take bath, that night when his mom asked him to come to dinner, there was one question gnawing his nous.


“Mummy! Aunty said the boatman’s kids went to a bad school and that everything they say is wrong! But I saw mummy, their teacher, like ours, also told them that 2 plus 5 is 7. Why is it that I should not play with them?”


The only answer he got was a pat on the head and a sigh.. He did not get the answer for years, and after he knew the answer, he never felt a rush of excitement seeing the river. It saddens him that he could never play with those kids again.


But he could never stop admiring the delicate rhythm of the boatman’s song.

A Letter is a Joy, No doubt!

Well this is going to be weird. For the first time since I started blogging, I felt like sharing something really personal, as a 
testimony to a wonderful friend I have! Chinni Chintu! Yeah, she rocks! :D


For this to make any sense, I ll have to fill you in, May 15th 2011, the last day at BITS Pilani,we were bidding farewell to each other when Chinni said, we should write to each other and stay in touch not only through calls and mails, it will be nice to have something to save, in an unconventional way. After 3 months in Bangalore, when I left to Delhi, I started writing to her! Here goes..

-------------------------------------------------------------


Dear Chinni, 21st March 2012
Wednesday, 19:48


When I first wrote to you,even when I was to write a simple letter I was scared stiff as if faced with looming seasickness. I am writing this letter in a very very very very.. yeah, keep that going for 2 days and you ll get to.. right about how happy I am, right now. Well, here it is.. Sometime around Nov 15th last year, I was reading the newspaper and underlining away to glory (yeah, thats what I do now! ;) ), when I saw this headline about a boeing crashing down in Haryana,saying one of the cockpit pilots lost his life, that was also the time around which I started writing letters to you.. I got the details of the guild which he belonged to, and wrote down a condolence.. Well, it was not a war, but I just felt like writing. Today, I got a postcard, I think it would be more appropriate to say, a 'Thank you' note saying that the letter meant something to the family. I am very happy seeing the reply!It is beyond me!I just read it with a grin from ear to ear! I did not expect that a 'postcard' would make me so happy! Walking on air, I must say! I owe this to you, Chinni! You made me take interest in writing to you, whatever it might be about.If memory serves me correctly,today, in the 6 months I have been writing to you, for the first time, I feel like I am writing something that is worth the postage. Elated, I am! This feeling is oddly unsettling! Love you Chinni, you are one person who just brings the best out of me! Love does not come to you only through calls, e-mails, msgs and Facebook,I would love to write something that is worth reading, and if not, something atleast worth the postage.. It is good to know that someone is ready to read what you wrote,even if it is not worth reading and that it is always means a lot to them! Love you Chinni, for not letting me give up my old habits for the new..! :) I know, I ll love reading them even 50 years from now because, Its good to know, someone remembers and treasures your handwriting.. Leaving behind, a value legacy!
Love,
Ravali (Snug as a bug in a rug!)


PS: I ran out of inland covers the other day, and when I went to the post office and asked for 20 of them. I got one of the weirdest stares I ever got!Call me old fashioned,but I am learning to write! It feels good!
Out of ink now,till I next write to you then! Take care..


-------------------------------------------------------------

To send a letter is a good way to go somewhere without moving anything but your heart.

Long time no post!

I forgot how refreshing it was to hibernate once in a while. Well, the enjoyment in being alone once in a while is just awesome. Enjoying that feeling after a long time. Posting all the posts that lay in dormant folders of my laptop.. Good feeling to lie back and kick a lazy Sunday afternoon with a book you have been trying to complete. Oh yeah, I completed it. And now posting. Check. Now the reviews of the books I read since I last posted! Check! Well here goes!

The immortals of Meluha and The secret of the Nagas - Amish

It was a by chance read (I buy Indian authors' books even without a thorough review)and I was pleasantly surprised to have stumbled upon Indian Mythology in the form of fiction. First off, hatsoff to the mind that brilliantly, vibrantly yet carefully moulded the known mythology into a gripping fiction. I actually fell in love with the name 'Shiva' after reading the introduction paragraph over and over again. As claimed there are some mishaps regarding the relation drawn to the Harappan civilization.. It was a gripping read and eagerly waiting for the next one to be on the stands soon..

Non Stop India - Mark Tully

I must confess, I ended up ordering this book only because of so much written in The Hindu and the fact that I loved the cover page! Seriously, I should stop judging the book from the cover. :D Just two words would do: Simple and Awesome. Everything from a village’s malignant problem to a city’s sophistication beautifully penned down by Mark Tully

. India is divided into two distinct classes: the contented and the discontented, the optimists and the pessimists, those who gush about the glorious future and those who anticipate a violent revolt. Tully meets both kinds during his extensive travels and presents objectively the scenarios which are provoking the extreme views. His conclusion at the end of the book is: “I am confident that there won’t be full stops to halt progress over the next twenty years.” I really loved the way the author institutionalised Vote Banks by saying ‘Vote Banking’.The Biblical dictum that "there is no new thing under the sun" in some measure applies to Non-Stop India.

JAYA- An illustrated retelling of Mahabharata – Devdutt Pattanaik

This was one book that really got to me in the recent past. I fell in love with every inch of the book, the cover design and everything that added to it from Lorem Ipsum to the very end of the book. For the love of the book, it demands one whole post. It was nothing less than – “AWESOME”. I might not find enough words to describe the feeling after I read this book in less than two days. ;) If you are, even at the slightest, thinking of buying the book, go to the store, turn to page 300 and read the third paragraph on ‘Kaliyuga’. After that I don’t think anything can stop you from buying it. I consider myself so lucky to have read this book. Rich in Mythology and avid contemporary connectivity to psychology.

Revolution 2020 - Chetan Bhagat

I was intrigued by the title ‘Love Corruption and Ambition’. By the end of the book also I was left to hold on to three discretely different things tied in a poor knot at one character who is, as always in Chetan Bhagath’s books, the narrator. Nicely put in words the frustrations undergone by a student facing IIT JEE and the other competitive exams. The story was too predictive at most of the places and the theme of the book had a late start and demands a better ending throwing more light on other characters a bit more than they got. I still can’t understand why girls need to be portrayed with a total lack of clarity!

I too had a love story - Ravinder singh

In a desperate attempt to find some book that didn’t talk about the society and will be a small detour and a light read into a love story I ended up reading this book and I still regret reading it completely due to my weakness of not being able to stop reading a book half way through. Seriously poor narration and a very boring story till the last 20 pages. It vividly reminded me of a poorly narrated south Indian movie which was a hit in Telugu and Tamil, sans illustrations. However, the efforts were great. Better language would have done a lot of good to the book. I hope that goes into ‘Can love happens twice?’

Siddhartha - Herman Hesse

The one thing I loved about the book was that they profoundly made it clear that what is read and what is preached is completely different from what can be experienced. Picking the right choice from a lot and learning to love it grows from within and it is nothing like someone holding your hand and making your way through the dark. Though not initially interested in reading the book, it really got to me by the time the writer started the beautiful illustrations of relating the life to a coursing river.

The White Tiger - Aravind Adiga

The book was a series of letters written by the protagonist. The novel studies a strong contrast between India's rise as a modern global economy and the lead character, Balram who comes from crushing rural poverties, and the opening lines of the novel establish this fact. It not only makes you laugh out loud but makes you think. ‘Take whatever comes out of a Prime minister’s speech and exactly the opposite is true about India.’ The way he clearly portrays the widening gap, dysfunctions and how least it bothers a poor man of how many international forums India is a part of really got me to think. Heavily thought provoking and darkly humorous and an honest account of the staggering economic inequality book. I just went wow after the book. 


Now, I think I should change the blog template. I don't see it go in tune with my mind right now.. Well you ll see if its done! ;)


PS:I promised myself that ll post more frequently, as complete isolation is not my cup of tea!

The Rushdie Effect :: Enumerating Art is such a misnomer

30th Jan 2012:

Every day for the last one week, all I have seen in the main page of the news paper was the tantrums of Salman Rushdie and the get backs of the Rajasthan Government when a month back. When I read about there being a Literature Festival, I was hoping more of a traditional, knowledge enriching debates and sessions to take place at a full scale. As the inception drew closer more and more controversies started rising up, about a book whose import was banned but downloading and owning is not. How mordacious is that? As the Literature Festival started the issue only engulfed the whole prominence resulting in mediocre outcomes and not many worthwhile writers were recognised appropriately. All the debates only saw the rain shadows of the paper last week. Sad as this may be, many started discussing about the sovereignty and the integrity of the country in justifying the ban ‘The Satanic Verses’ as it all comes to an end, as is always there, more often than not, theories about the whole literary society emerge and classifying art into broadly two categories, both of which not even remotely giving importance to the ‘purpose of passion’ of the writers, at the end of the article from what Justice Katju said, one who would after reading the article would come to a conclusion that the writers have to be categorised into either of the genres and that as ‘romanticism’ is not all the useful for a sociological insight all one has to do is publish, read, cherish and innovate on the books with ‘social’ purpose if there is a scope of narrowing down what the country needs basing on the social and infrastructural conditions prevailing in and around. 

One book that will never stop me from respecting Salman Rushdie

Does it mean that in Ancient India because people were living in flourishing wealth of societies they had the insight and the option of taking up ‘romanticism’ and because now the society faces many problems like poverty, population and pollution we don’t encourage it and of course seriously criticise anything that is fictional as too simplistic and non – serious? In such a poor country art for social purpose alone can be acceptable? We are here forgetting some facts that fiction like ‘Harry Potter’ and ‘Lord of the Rings’ succeeded in getting back the internet generation to books and helped in re-inculcating the awesomeness of long-forgotten book reading again. I am one person who tends to read Indian authors, even when the rating is not that good, many authors these days, fiction and semi-fiction, have made it to the stands and impressed the international market. No offence meant to the non- fiction writers, there are great books that are instilling and inspiring in today’s world, and this will not be complete without mentioning ‘Everybody loves a good drought’, ‘Non Stop India’, that hit the stands recently and many other books. So it is that an art cannot and should not be narrowed down to theories where there is an either- or relationship, it would be better appreciated if we can see it as, the penchant of a passionate person shared by many. Awareness is what matters and, just because the art supports a social cause and is a change agent, doesn’t make it accepted or appreciated; acknowledging the élan of impressionism, existentialism and realism is also a form of appreciating and recognition to art. Just because there is art for social sake, art for art’s sake can’t be made the foot note. It will show that we are capable of accepting that art’s purpose is subtler, this will help broaden the perspective with which this generation can appreciate art. Expression and Appreciation should come and go ‘As you like it’, as Art has no bounds.

Vigilance v/s Awareness: What changes v/s what stays

As I was flipping through the news paper the other day I came across a not very flashy ad about the “Vigilance awareness week”, that said, “Never Exchange a penny or dime, Corruption is a crime, Come forward to report incidents of corruption that come to your notice”. The bygone era has seen many experts and amateurs lecturing and chiding of extirpation of the malady. Now, there are large-scale fronts about it. Coming to the latter part of the ad, I couldn’t help but drift off to a regional movie scene, where the overtly genuine and sincere lead actor is guffawed at, by the bystanders, with no hint of ignominy what so ever, as he complains on the shoddy train facilities, though his complaints in the movie go in vain, we realise that this paradigm of not complaining against authority, without being made fun of, starts really early.




Speaking of movies, a complaint against the black ticket market goes unnoticed with a powerful influence. Bribing might not be the only way out always. Inter alia, a puny little girl in her fifth class, writing a test along with her seniors, complains audible to the whole class ‘Teacher that senior is copying!’, the teacher did warn the senior, who, glares at the little girl, who is left with building trepidation only to know that seniority puts on its gloves shortly, ok that was my classmate in the fifth standard, who later had a rich course of instruction from the seniors on respect. Graduation mein, it is just the one guy who quetches about a ‘friendly ragging’ who lands with minimal friends at the end of the 4
years, other naming him ‘the spoil sport’ and ‘sincere samurai’ of the batch. Everyone who bribes to get benefits has a cooler image of getting things done, and the one that remains sincere to the rules is made fun at. You are sincere and you stick to your guns only means you are not being ‘practical’. My brother japed me when I asked him to hold on to the plastic bottle till he finds a bin to throw it, something similar happens if you ask your mom not take a plastic bag. Trust me! Well no one heeds to the little we can do to help the nation, albeit sans crime, everything that can be done is but ignored. Everybody knows, umpteen such incidents arouse the natural human tendency of turning a blind eye to vigilance over others. Thence, slowly lose to ascribe self vigil also.




Almost always when the traffic rules are violated, it is just a matter of two phone calls and the ‘influential’ person is out of the (not very) tough spot, it is the same story everywhere, the railways where not once did I travel without a person ‘managing’ a berth without reservation in lieu of bribe. The same is true with child labour. Apart from these modest next door exemplars, many loud and firm issues lack vigilance by the responsible authorities, who was to ask when Canada was to oppugning to Sri Lanka (in the case of LTTE) but not so vigilant about USA, when it did the same. Coming home to India, who has a vigil on all the schisms? And, the Manipur blockade is a source of sufferance
to the citizens. However, there is no vigil on the black market that flourishes! But then, democracy isn't a state of perfection. It has to be improved, and that means constant vigilance. The end of the week in the news was marked by the 99th day of Manipur blockade. With or without vigilance, awareness helps and stays enlightens on what is and what is not.


Once a year, one week of anamnesis about vigilance awareness might not suffice and address the pressing need of the hour. Scandals might not come to light but then, at the least a couple of bribers who obtrude upon your train berth will be kept at bay. A few traffic outlaws will be ticketed, and
learn to walk the line. As we grow up to be accountable to the society, vigilance always takes the first call to development. I realize, when at school, I did not know what vigilance meant, I was not aware. I was among those who laughed at the girl who complained. Hope the seventh
billion will know to study and learn to be vigilant. They will then be aware, conscious and empowered. Then, the need to have a week for awareness about vigilance will only sound queer, till eternity. After all, Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty.

Cyber Rebirth

It must be because of my graduation and three months of corporate life after that, for all the problems I am studying about right now, I am tending towards a cyber solution, to be frank we need to agree that there is mounting importance in making the two ropes into a knot, for development.

- With growing concerns about ‘privacy’, everyone wants a secure and flashy site, whatever the need be. 

- User Interface grows in importance as the internet users increase in number

In a day of great advances in the Server Technology and Server Protection tactics in the cyber world, it is but an ignominy that an individual could hack eight Indian government sites, all of which after hacking are not of great difficulty to be defaced, keeping in view the stature of the source code it can have. It is of great importance, that in an age where a school kid relies on the internet to complete his homework, the government sites in India are in such a vulnerable situation.

SERVER SECURITY:

India, an emerging power in the field of information technology, known for the number engineers it produces year after year, does not have a decent way of protecting the sites from getting hacked, let alone portraying the services online? How would a customer, with growing awareness for privacy, trust the online services with the sites being so assailable?  Need is that the sites are developed in security and design to appeal to the customers, like the private sector is attracting customers.

As a country producing 3 million new graduates, of which 1.1 million are software engineers, each year, with adept human resources in the field of IT, it is deplorable that when a mere citizen having a Social networking site, page can control with great efficiency the information available about him on the net, the nation is not able to look into checking the number of sites being hacked every day.

Seems like the Technology Vaporware, 2009 could only get down the numbers from 600s to 117. Though a great number progress has been made, for a country like India, with such a stature in Information Technology, the numbers are still high. Most of the government sites take advantage of frames in presenting a large amount of information in a static web page which is vulnerable to the techniques used to gain access to unauthorized information through advanced search queries. Google hacking employs searching sites using special characters, logical operators and operators such as cache, filetype, link, site, intitle, inurl.

Lack of a prescribed procedure for auditing, hosting, maintenance and upgrading of security measures and new advancements can be taken as he main reasons for this.   

·        Government websites and applications have to be audited from the cyber security perspective prior to their hosting and after, on a regular basis, like really strict vigilance.

·        Hosting the websites which haven’t undergone a strict cyber security audit should not be made possible.

·        Immediate action should be taken in upgrading the security of the hosting structure.

·        Alerts regarding the latest developments in cyber crime and how to dodge them.

·        Damage caused by Cross site shifting should be  taken into consideration.

·        Any form of inputs like page headers, cookies, query string, hidden fields used on forms and forms fields used to gather some sort of input from the users should be validated before an update.

DESIGN AND USER-INTERFACE:

Design is a funny word. Some people think design means how it looks. But of course, if you dig deeper, it's really how it works.

Nevertheless, it is true that what looks good is called ‘attractive’ for a reason. More than 66% of the users give importance to the design and user interface, in a site that provides or vouches for services. Serious thought has to be put in the direction of improving the design and support patterns that are incorporated in various Indian websites, especially those that are into services related to communication. Less number of frames can be incorporated in the website to make them more browser compatible, look wise. Also, for those who say that the ‘Lorem Ipsum factor’ of saying that the design matters only a little, in today’s world one has to realise the importance of design and User Interface compatibility to an average customer. When the appearance causes a deep veneration and presentation remains good, also as long as one can place trust in the security systems only then can one want to be a customer.

Though impossible to negate the hacks in total, a dedicated capacity of efforts has to be put into this area not only to protect the government sites from being hacked, but also to improve the reliance of the people on the public sector sites for information and services.

Golden Days

For all the joys I shared, for all the special people I met, for all the happy places, for inspiration n disincentive celebrations n sorrows, excitement n composure,antsy n slack, challenges n credences, for rapture, veneration, dire and ambition for passions,idolization, poise, zeal n zany, For making me realize, that 'Forever' is too good to be true. Thank you for always making me feel accepted and loved.. 

Thank you for making me what I am, and i will be. This is the end of the best thing that ever happened to me! I'll carry the memories of this part of the journey all life long.. :)

Thank You BITS pilani..

Festival Mood Vs Monday Blues

Every 'Essay and Elocution' class (We had once a week, I chose this ‘essay and elocution.. Duhh.. What a nerd I was at school!!’), when at school just after a festival.. the topic always used to be.. 'How did you celebrate....' So and so festival..
So lame as it may sound to you now as you read it.. :P I could just buy into the myth of re-writing on that topic again.. :D


Not nostalgic.. But what the hell.. this is my place to write afterall! ;) 'Revisiting Essay n Elocution classes' And also ofcourse because I was at home for 'Vinayaka Chaviti' , well let me put it as you might call it 'Ganesh Chathurti', after 4 years.. And one more thing that adds up is 'Ramzan' also fell on the same day.. Dunno how.. and there were many wallpapers uploaded on Facebook and people commenting on how proud they are feeling to be Indians.. lol :D
I liked some wallpapers though..(Sure not the comments and the slogans..Just the wallpapers Patriotism is something much beyond those slogans is what I think! :) ) ;)

My essay in 8th or 9th classes would have started, I swear.. like this..

A picture uploaded by one of my friends on FB! :D

"I got up early in the morning."

But, I didn't. :D


"I took bath and put on new clothes."
But, I didn't. :D


"I helped my mother in her household chores."
But, I didn't. :D


"I prayed to god with utmost respect and unshakable faith and belief."
But, I didn't. :D


"I studied for some time.(Because on this day, my mom always said.. U must study, to get good results! :P )"
But, I didn't. :D


"I went to the temple in the eve and stayed there singing along with the many devotees."
But, I didn't. :D


What I did was, wake up very late.. Went shopping with my dad for all the stuff the puja required for the day, tantrums with my brother.. Shopping with my cousin.. Had very nice food.. My mother prayed.. Sincerely.. I just sat and watched her do that! :D Watched an awful, horrible, disgusting gult movie (More on this later!) with my family.. Texted all my friends wishes.. Replied to some mails.. Checked Facebook (twice! :P :D ).. Did not study at all!! And as I forgot mentioning.. had Biryani and Haleem the day before.. Yeah, proud to be an Indian! ;) :D


But needless to say.. I was so happy the whole day to be home for a festival.. May sound weird to you.. but stay in 'Pilani' and you would say.. Its nice to see some civilization after two weeks.. ;)


Quality family time.. :) And the next day I find myself blogging about it during the utterly boring office hours.. What should I say.. Monday blues.. Or is this just another horrible way of spending 1/5th of your life?! :P


I was so happy at the end of the day.. I wanted this post up on the blog the same day..
I restrained myself from doing that..
But now, I didn’t! :D
Festive post 5! :D Cyazz..

5 years of time! To be or Not to be..

4th September 2010,

2:00am : Watched that one movie. Lost gale in the sequences I always loved, once upon a time!
2:15am: Switched off the laptop.. Checked my cell phone. No missed
calls.. No messages. Hmmph! That, I knew!
2:16am : "Hey, Pls let me know of the tym and place, about the
workshop thing tomoro! :) Gudnyt.."
Send message to: Mr.A..

2:17am: A water bottle.. Dark room.. Earphones on.. Some random song..
2:19am: Fireflies! :)
2:20am: Fireflies.. And my favourite song on the shuffled list! " Ahh..Feels Great!!" :)
2:22am: One more arrest to the deterrent late nights in the mobile light.. Shimmering!
2:25am: Tuckered at the assured Midnight blues... And.. ZzzzZZzzzzz!! O-)
7:00am: Sleepy eyes, Half open.. Checked the inbox to find a Text..
"Kalasiguda Boys Highschool,Secunderabad Patny Centre.. Be there by
1:30pm! :) Gudmorning.."
7:10am: Back to sleep.. :)
:D :D :D For the next few hours.. Some completely random stuff I wouldn't dicker for an extravagent sizzling hot chocolate brownie! :D:D :D
1:34 pm: Waiting at the spot, cognizant of the text I got earlier that
day! Though just four minutes late, I was tensed of being missed out
upon this! I did not want to miss..
1:58pm: After a few random calls, They come and pick me up and take me to the school.. Hence making me realize, yet again, I am bad.. No.. not just bad, I am BADDD at finding places..!
What happened there in lieu of a sober weekend afternoon is what is making me write this post!

As we entered the school.. The principal came out..
"Great to have you guys here! It is a really good thing that you are
conducting a career guidance workshop to the 9th and tenth classes ,It
is going to be really helpful for them. Please try and do it every
year, so that all the batches are benefitted."
It was one single building, close to ruins, I have seen worse.. But the terrace did not have a pent wall.. Dangerous! The children were all over the place.. None clad with uniforms.. Too much noise...
As this was what was happening infront of me... Something occurred to me, Something long forgotten.. Something that was enshrouded by many other playful memories I held on to..




"That was a sunny February afternoon, 5 years ago.. I was 
sitting the 9th class (D section room),When my class teacher 
walked in, many flyers and a few pamphlets crouched in her 
hands.. As she came in..
distributed those, everyone in the class was excited while 
they read.. I still remember the first question it put to us.. 


'What is your goal?/ What is the career option you would opt 
for?'"
As these memories rushed.. Someone, from behind.. 'Hey, 
which one do you think?'
I said "Yeah yeah, U were asking me to chose right? This 
poster is good, We ll use this one today!"
The principal was back, He went in to subdue the children, 
with all the possible concern one can have.. "Please speak to 
them as if you are one among them, they would not 
understand or reach out to you if you
spoke eccentric."

Consenting to what he said, 
We entered the hallway.. 
Where all the 8th,9th and 
10th class students were eager to know what is with 
us, till we distributed some 
sheets, Where the first question said "What is your goal?" 
The group of 8th class kids I was allocated to give a career 
guidance workshop on.. Out of the 11 in that group.. 7 
wanted to be Doctors and their answer to Why? Was not 'I 
don’t know' They all answered  that they wanted to serve 
the society. I was amazed! 3 Police officers and a 
Mechanical Engineer also held me amazed at their social 
responsibility.


"I never had a problem writing in English in my 8th or 
9th,or for that matter I never had a problem speaking in 
English too! As a kid always wanted to be a doctor! And 
as the second question asked, Why? I did not know why, I 
always wanted to be.. May be because they can help 
everyone. That was the first time in the 9th I  filled in that answer.. And I was asked to go to a room where our 
career counsellers were supposed to be sitting.. As I 
walked through the corridors.. Gay with
the sunlight.. I always felt, that someday I would be a 
doctor and there will be people waiting for me in the lounge.. waiting for my help.. For a hand to save, inspired by life! That day all I remember was most of my other classmates filled in 'Software 
Engineers' 'Mechanical Engineers' and ofcourse 
'Sportsman', Many had different reasons, and some of 
them filled in 'To serve the people'"


As they filled in the forms, One thing I observed.. They all 
had trouble with English, spellings and words, But they did 
not want to write in Telugu. They wanted to fill it up in 
English. They were determined to do that and they made me 
spell each and every word of the four questions that form 
had! I explained them of what all career options they had 
other than what they opted for and also how to reach there! 


They were mischievous, but were keen on knowing, intent 
on heeding! All the scholarship programs available, And also 
a toll free number launched for the guidance program. At 
the end of the workshop, as we bid farewell to them, I don’t 
know if I ll met these kids again, a kid (who wants to be a doctor)came to me, and 
asked me.. 'Di, Who are
you? A doctor? Did you also fill these forms in your 8th 
class?'
I smiled. I did not answer! I did not want to! May be of the 
guilt that I cheated on my own dreams!


Or may be.. I did not want the kid to know that a failure 
guided him on his career plans! Whatever that has happened 
to me.. I am a happy person now. I have been that person for long.. But that question, I could not just answer, 
fondling the kids hair.. I just said 'Study well.. One day you 
should be a doctor.. I ll come
to you for the treatment!' He smiled, wide 'Yes Di.. One day 
after I become a doctor.. I ll call this toll free number and I 
ll ask them to inform you that I achieved
it!' Given to merry frolicking of his fellow mates.. He left 
home..!

When we all sat jotting down the logistics of the day and observation on the statistics..
'More than 90% of them wanted to be police! And serve the society'
'More than 30% of them wanted to be Doctos, also to serve people'
5 years back.. I don’t know how many answered 'To serve the society..' But I bet its fewer.. much much less than 90% way less than that. I forgot to mention.. I went to one of the finest schools in town.. 'It
was private' I know why I did not want to be a doctor. Fear. Selfish, I put myself before the society. There may be many reasons why I am not a doctor now. The point is,I couldnot catch up with what I dreamt as a kid! I might be a happy person today. But I am not the person what I always wanted to be!
I never had to walk,bare foot, 2 miles to get to school.
I never faced problems buying books.
I never sat in a class room that did not have a fan.
I never had problem writing or speaking in English.
I never worked for others after the school hours.
I never wore ragged clothes.
I never slept hungry.
My life was set.. to a certain standard of living. I was a happy child. I did not know that the other side of the coin even existed! None of my classmates ever had those efforts to be made. We were born and brought up happy.. May be that is the reason.. We could not see beyond a Happy ending.. A happy person with lots of money. May be that is why We could not fill the 'Why' column. May be that is why I am not a person whom I dreamt of being! I am this now! And I cant go back to chose the other road! Yet again, My life was set.
7:30 pm: Back to my room.
9:30 pm: Started drafting a blog post.
And now I type this:
"I don’t like saying ‘the poor' or the 'needy' there aren't any. They are not poor. They are the dream catchers. Lancer! Its time we stopped feeling happy about our set lives.. What I could not do, I want the others to achieve. Who are more willed upon achieving it! You are already the person whom you dreamt of being? Then why don’t you be the first stepping stone to the others who are striving hard to catch up!?"
It was the same, I was still the same person.. But that day.. When I went to bed.. I was happier..
Happier than I have ever been..
5th September 2010,
2:17am : A water bottle.. Dark room.. Earphones on.. Some random song..
2:19am: Fireflies! :)
It is just that they looked more beautiful to me! :)

I was a happy person.. Now I am happier! :)

Now, that I shared my dreams.. :) Just because I realized, Its never too late.. And nothing is set! I thanked all my teachers before sleep hunkered down.. Atleast,I am a happy person. And I could make atleast one kid 'Dream big!'